tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1883263011548393946.post1990443124093161985..comments2023-07-04T09:58:32.905-04:00Comments on My Tales of Life and Love After Divorce: I'm Not A Mom. Do I Cry or Cheer? 12 Reasons to Cheer for Being Childfree (Right Now)Divorced Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01740271601866523220noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1883263011548393946.post-29089431267728292002015-02-13T08:32:38.911-05:002015-02-13T08:32:38.911-05:00It's just something the 'childfree' ar...It's just something the 'childfree' are a bit strict about. There's a big difference. Sometimes I think I'm more 'childless' because I didn't meet the right person in time and the choice was never really mine. But I'm not pining for a child and am happy not to have one so I do class myself as childfree.CFandHappynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1883263011548393946.post-49082834656706892672015-02-12T09:12:36.389-05:002015-02-12T09:12:36.389-05:00I hadn't thought about it that way.I hadn't thought about it that way.Divorced Katnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1883263011548393946.post-86788501732223057182015-02-08T14:38:34.566-05:002015-02-08T14:38:34.566-05:00You're 'childless'! There's no suc...You're 'childless'! There's no such thing as 'childfree for now'. Childfree is a permanent state, you've decided for whatever reason you're not having kids, they're absolutely not in your future. You are childless in that you might have them one day.CFandHappynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1883263011548393946.post-56482380899561337652014-05-12T13:23:42.949-04:002014-05-12T13:23:42.949-04:00Happy anniversary! I have a friend who also opted ...Happy anniversary! I have a friend who also opted to not have children, and no one can believe it. They're both wonderful with children, but they didn't feel having kids was right for them. Good for them for not giving in to societal pressure.<br />I *hope* I have kids... but that said, I also hope I won't feel that my life is incomplete if I do not become a mother.Divorced Katnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1883263011548393946.post-81175747117589363202014-05-12T12:57:22.081-04:002014-05-12T12:57:22.081-04:00As someone who is childfree by choice, I still fin...As someone who is childfree by choice, I still find it baffling how so many people seem to think it makes our marriage somehow less-than. We are very happy and just celebrated our nineteen anniversary. A fulfilled, purposeful life does not have to include children. (BTW: I wrote a childfree post for Mother's Day too - smile)Dianehttp://www.beingtrulypresent.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1883263011548393946.post-55977806257264372242013-08-25T18:02:14.458-04:002013-08-25T18:02:14.458-04:00It's strange though, to have opposing feelings...It's strange though, to have opposing feelings at the same time, but that kind of sums up my life since filing for divorce!<br />I think you are very smart to not jump in to having kids if you're not ready. Having kids is kind of a lot work, don't you think?!?!Divorced Katnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1883263011548393946.post-42350417271336929322013-08-23T17:06:37.345-04:002013-08-23T17:06:37.345-04:00Well put. I think it is TOTALLY true to feel both ...Well put. I think it is TOTALLY true to feel both ways at the same time. And that is so normal that if it weren't the case I'd think it was weird! I'm creeping up to the age where people have started asking me when I'm gonna start "taking care of kids of my own". Well, not now! I am gladly going to keep collecting that paycheck to play with other kids, thank you!Nannypology Storiesnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1883263011548393946.post-39568581387221081292013-05-21T15:07:46.170-04:002013-05-21T15:07:46.170-04:00It's hard to not have kids and know what I mig...It's hard to not have kids and know what I might not ever... but yes, I appreciate that when we finally don't live together anymore, the relationship that Max and I have will be one we choose, not once we were forced into.Divorced Kathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01740271601866523220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1883263011548393946.post-6417685705243904542013-05-21T14:13:38.873-04:002013-05-21T14:13:38.873-04:00My ex and I never wanted kids. In fact, before we...My ex and I never wanted kids. In fact, before we got married in 2004 he got a vasectomy. He didn't like me having to take birth control forever, so he got the vasectomy so I could be chemical free. We both agreed that if later in life we decided we did want kids we could always adopt. Neither one of us felt our genes were so great that we must reproduce them. <br /><br />I can't imagine how hard divorce must be when kids are involved, so as hard as this is on you now, it could be so much worse.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1883263011548393946.post-29937869770966668952013-05-17T13:47:02.402-04:002013-05-17T13:47:02.402-04:00Then it's all about being the best momma you c...Then it's all about being the best momma you can be to your doggie! :)Divorced Kathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01740271601866523220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1883263011548393946.post-90217124296942609842013-05-17T11:20:12.731-04:002013-05-17T11:20:12.731-04:00I just turned 36 and I don't have any kids eit...I just turned 36 and I don't have any kids either. Like you I can't imagine having kids and bringing them into my current relationship. The husband and I have been married for 12 years, and about the last few have been kinda crappy. I am however a furkid momma to a 4 year old wiener dog that I love very much. tamgraverhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12665621874040501204noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1883263011548393946.post-67963952867907908202013-05-17T08:40:39.947-04:002013-05-17T08:40:39.947-04:00I was at happy hour once and the group started tal...I was at happy hour once and the group started talking about labor and delivery! Appalling. And disgusting. Thankfully I had a friend there who didn't have kids, so we talked about The Bachelor.Divorced Kathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01740271601866523220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1883263011548393946.post-16385327810742987982013-05-16T18:49:42.895-04:002013-05-16T18:49:42.895-04:00I like 3 on your list. I went for lunch with a gr...I like 3 on your list. I went for lunch with a group of coworkers and one actually started asking another about her potty training protocol and then shared his tales of potty training. Horrors! I actually had to look at him and tilt my head as if to say "Really? During a lunch out?"Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1883263011548393946.post-49383985662805901052013-05-14T08:54:12.206-04:002013-05-14T08:54:12.206-04:00Monique, one of the best things about keeping this...Monique, one of the best things about keeping this blog is "meeting" people like you who understand how complicated emotions can be surrounding divorce.<br />And absolutely, I'd rather wait to have - or *gulp* never have - children than bring them into an unstable relationship. How anyone can think a baby can save a relationship, I'll never know. Looks plenty stressful for functional, normal couples!Divorced Kathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01740271601866523220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1883263011548393946.post-90285012075991645762013-05-14T00:27:01.542-04:002013-05-14T00:27:01.542-04:00This is such a good post. Especially "backin...This is such a good post. Especially "backing into" not having kids. Like you people always tell me how lucky I am that me and my ex never had kids together. But I am clear I want children and often times fear I am getting too old for that to happen. This year when I was checking out Mother's Day card i found myself a little emotional. Just like when I was looking on facebook and saw my friends celebrating their mother's day with their children i felt a slight twinge of sadness. This was a first for me. But I like the silver lining you wrote about. There are many advantages to not having kids at this moment. The good news is we get to have our children when we are with the right man and they will see a healthy relationship and we will be having them for the right reasons not to just save a marriage. Great read! Monique Khttp://www.confessionsofaserialdaterinla.comnoreply@blogger.com